Chapter Six – Questions and Demands
1. Are you consciously thinking about how you react to both compliments and insults? Be more aware of this. Can you use the heat of the insult and the power of the compliment?
2. Are you allowing neutral people to help you self-sabotage by throwing your ideas out to them with harmful qualifiers and disclaimers – I had the weirdest thought, this is going to sound stupid… Can you watch that and try to stop yourself? Be aware of how you test your ideas and gauge if you’re short-changing them before you’ve even fully considered them yourselves.
3. Did you make that list of people you run your ideas by – maybe even placing them on sliding scales from champion to critic? If you do this, then think about when you invite them into your process. That’s crucial.
4. Are you aware of the people who are draining your energy? When you’re drained, were you just in the company of someone who makes you lose faith in yourself? Likewise, is there someone who always kind of fills your tank? Be aware of these folks.
5. I’m just going to let you meditate on your partnership if you have a significant other. This is too complicated for a simple question.
6. When you’re rejected with a kind note – or the equivalent in your field – do you submit to them again soon or give up? Reflect. Realize that there are folks out there who don’t see the kind rejection as a door closing but instead a door opening.
7. Where are you with your ambition? Check in.
8. Can you think about where your potential collaborators are likely to be and can you try to show up there?
9. Do you have someone who goads you – for better or for worse? Do you have a good nemesis?
10. If in doubt, are you using your imagination to call upon someone in your field, someone you couldn’t actually get connected with in real life, and are you asking them for advice? It’s possible that the answer is inside of you and you just have to borrow someone else’s gravitas in order to access it.
11. Where do you land on simplifying your life? Does it help or do you need to get out more? Where do you land on simplifying your workspace? Psst. It’s okay to be messy. Truly.
12. Do you have writing rituals that get you in the headspace to write? Are they healthy? Or have they gotten out of hand?
13. Have you ever considered a coach? What would that look like in your field?